an uncomfortable time

Well, it has been a while.  I’ve been hanging out on tumblr periodically and getting in too much FB, especially damned Candy Crush Saga.

Life has gone into an uncomfortable place, for a number of reasons.  My youngest is going in for an adenoidectomy on Aug. 1 and the wait is a test for the patience (limited) of each of us.  He is one miserable little person and his weight is bottomed out.  I want to cry each time I look at him and feel his tiny little legs.  My oldest is hanging in there, but I have to wonder if the stresses in the family don’t dig into him.  

I had to be a part of a meeting at work this week that can best be described as “kicking a puppy” for how awful it made me feel.  How bad I feel was far exceeded by the recipient of the meeting and I can only hope that incredible things happen for her, as that would be the best possible outcome.

I’d like to write more about the other uncomfortable situation, but truthfully, I don’t know if I can do it in a public forum and so I think I’ll tuck it away inside myself.  I’d like to lance it from my system, as I don’t have another outlet, but there’s too much possibility of hurt.

Why is being an adult so hard?  Why are we left so aware of the possibilities and yet, often, not able to achieve them.  Why be able to imagine the best of worlds, but be stuck in the mud?

I threw a coin into a fountain last week, wishing for some relief for my son and some good health for my family.  I threw a second one for financial peace.  I guess I should have added one coin more… for peace, period.

On that note, I’m going to bed.

moonfire