Some days are up, some are down

I don’t know if it was the moon today or what, but the day has been fairly sucky.  I got my filling done this morning and spent most of the day with either a numb face OR a sore face.  I hurt my lip eating lunch and that pretty much set the tone for the rest of the day.

The children were in a strange mood tonight too.  W.Y. was non-talkative and T.T. was hyper.  We survived our session and made it through ok.  The little one was as sweet as ever, but even she was having a harder time today.

Next week I’ll be adding in some more traditional type things but I’m also going to hunt down some more games for us.  Anything that prompts language acquisition is perfect.  All in all, we’ve done well this week and made big progress. T.T. wrote on the back of the picture I drew of myself, “I love you miss shannon.”  It is in my bag and I’m going to take it to work and hang it on my bulletin board.

Speaking of work, I am supremely tired of the disorganization and lack of decent communication.  My patience with it all was thin to begin with and has now descended into nothingness.  One of the women that I dread dealing with was once again obnoxious to me and I’m heartily sick of her baloney.  She is unpleasant to work with and non-communicative.  When she does finally do something, it is usually paired up with her telling me that I’m wrong about something.  Luckily I knew this was going to be an issue and confirmed all my information with the HR department before she called me.

It’s making me nuts.  She gets pissy with me because she blew something.

There are two openings that I’m qualified for and I’m putting in for them.  One is with the feds and, given my education intentions, I’d prefer to go that route so I can be well-positioned to apply to the job I really want as I get closer to completing things.  In the meantime, it’d serve me well to get established with them.  The market is so tight and there are so many applying for the few jobs that come up, that I have no expectations of getting called.  Still, not trying guarantees I won’t so I have to make the effort.

Bren is being a pill tonight – good, but still a pill. I’ll talk to his teacher in the morning and see if I can get clarification on what he’s been doing and what she’s observed.   He’s really hard to pin down on things, so the best I can do is keep the lines of communication open.

I wish I had more interesting things to say, but honestly I’m simply wiped out.  I have nothing left at this point.  The long days this week have finished me off and I really need a good night’s sleep.  I used the bulb syringe on the baby, plus Benadryl and a humidifier.  I’m hoping that means sleep will be good for all of us tonight.  It’s a hope, not a guarantee.

I wish that I knew I had a really good shot at that job….  I need to break free of the cycle I’ve found myself in.  It was a mess from the first day I got there and it’s gone down hill since then.  Just when I think I might be finding my feet, someone comes along and changes the expectations.  I just don’t have the energy left to keep hanging in there, uncertainty and all.  I need a solid supervisor who gives clear parameters for the work I’m doing.  I need to understand my role in the department and how I am meant to fulfill that.

It’s time.  That’s all I have to say.  Everything else is just a moot point.  Cuts are going to happen …  people are going to lose their jobs.  Better to do what I need to, rather than sit here, feeling all ducklike and vulnerable.

Cheers on the last night before the weekend.

moonfire.

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