More than a little tired…

The six year olds have taken me down!  🙂

So took the Praxis today.  I got my math score instantly – 186.  I have no idea if that’s good or bad, but I needed a 175 for my program and I took it cold today, so I’m pretty happy.  I had planned to study but time and circumstances nixed that.

It’ll be 2-3 weeks before I have my writing test results.  This is going to be a very long wait… sigh…

I took some small presents over to the kids I’ll be tutoring…  I wish I could have done more, but this was a stretch as it was.  I spoke to the volunteer who is helping them and what she told me about one of the little girls is just breaking my heart.  It has hit me recently that I won’t be able to just go in and do my job, then be done with them.  The older brother and the little cousin will be fine, but this little girl doesn’t need someone else leaving her life.  When I do this, I have to commit to be there for her, if not as her tutor then as her friend.

She’s already met me so that means (in my mind) that it is meant to be.

Reaching her is going to be hard.  I have some things that I’ll try, but I don’t know how long it’s going to take to get through to her.

So as I was coming home tonight, after I dropped off the presents, I was thinking about the little girl and how much I wanted to find a way to help her.  Up ahead I thought I saw a big dog crossing the multiple lanes in the dark….  but when I got up closer to it on my side of the street I saw it clearly and it wasn’t a dog.  It was a doe.  She was beautiful, with her delicate ears and long legs.

Do you ever get a feeling that you’re getting a message?

Once in a great while I get something like that and tonight I felt that message.  I don’t know how much I can help, but I have to try.  I have to be a part of this little girl’s life.  I’m not the type to pray, but when I saw that doe I couldn’t help but ask – just in case someone might be listening.

I need to stop writing now.  I’m tired and I need to get ready for bed.  Tomorrow’s a big day and the tree isn’t up yet.  I need sleep.

cheers,
moonfire

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