Had my first torture training session tonight. And yes. I’m paying for someone to torment me. Crazy. It actually hurts to type. How is that even possible?
As I was going through the gyrations necessary to undo years of damage to my body, it flittered (several times) through my mind that it is truly much easier and faster to do the damage than it is to undo it. It’s almost effortless to add a pound or two here and there, until, finally, you are an overweight mother of two children with nothing to show for your bad habits except an ever-increasing collection of strange clothes in miscellaneous sizes.
I must say though… my trainer, Mark, is a good guy. He deserves credit for sticking in there with me. Yes… he’s paid to do this, but he quite possibly could be changing my life – perhaps assisting me in regaining the years I’ve chopped off. So I’ll give him credit, even as I wimp and moan about how he must be a sadist.
My thighs have been calling me a bitch all day. I think they’re ready to secede now. My stomach isn’t complaining too much because I’ve been cutting calories but sticking with foods that have good flavor. My arms and shoulders are shell-shocked and I believe they’ll begin piping off tomorrow morning. My feet don’t care… they’re numb from the athletic shoes and socks.
My ass is still silent, stunned by disbelief that I’d do this.
My head is cheering – ever the voice of reason, my head thinks it’s about damn time we got off our fat ass and did something about the bodily status.
***
Work was good. Our call queue has been loaded with things I know nothing about and it’s been a bit depressing. I infinitely prefer taking calls to listening in to others do it. I have school work to do tonight, but I think it’s hot bath and reading, then I’ll succumb to sleep. I’m wiped. In my defense, I did cardio yesterday and today (this morning), then I did the hour workout (ok, the work part was probably 45 minutes) with the trainer this evening. I’ve got 8 days until I see him again. I’m hoping to put some distance between the sad shape I’m in tonight and the person I hope will meet up with him a week from Wednesday.
Back to the school business… I just want to be DONE. I’ve had it. One class it is for the rest of my degree. More than that and I can’t find any balance between everything I need to do each week.
ok.
It’s harder and harder to type. Bath time (with bubbles) and reading.
All I have to say is this: I’m glad I started now, before it got any worse. The fun part will be coming up with my rewards as I meet my milestones on the way to my goal weight.
Cheers one achy, almost broken moonfire
